Torn's Little Problem
by Kitty Kat-chan
Summary: After an incident in the showers, Torn finds that he has this little problem concerning Jak. As this little problem gets harder and harder to handle, Torn finds it increasingly difficult to keep his hands off of Jak...
1. The Problem

**Alright, so this just sorta popped up into my mind a few minutes ago, and I'll just be making stuff up as I go. It's a Torn/Jak fic, and it should be… Pretty interesting. ; **

**Oh, one more thing. This fic is a combination of Jak 2 and Jak 3. Also a few things will be changed… Like Damas's death… Poor Damas.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Jak and Daxter series… Naughty Dog's lawyers won't let me.**

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**Torn's Little Problem**

**Chapter 1: Torn's "Little" Problem, Jak's Confusion**

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We all know about Torn. He's that renegade ex-KG officer with a face decorated with tattoos and a voice that made him sound like he had a bad case of laryngitis, not to mention his personality, which gave almost everyone the impression that he had a very large stick jammed up his rear exit.

But what we don't know about him is that he has this little problem. Well, ok, it's not exactly a little problem—more like a medium sized one. Oh, who the hell am I kidding, his problem is _HUGE!_

You see, the root of his problem had a name; Jak.

You know—the blonde elf with the little annoying orange ottsel that constantly rode around on his shoulder making smart-ass and perverted comments. The blonde, blue-eyed, extremely well-toned elf who tended to get a bit… trigger-happy. Jak, the guy who was locked up in a prison for two years, given extremely torturous and painful Dark Eco treatments, which left him with some sort of evil, sadistic split personality-type thing.

And now I'm sure you're wondering, why the hell is Jak a problem to Torn?

Well it's several things, really. His body for one.

Now, all of us Jak-fans know that Jak has an _EXTRODINARILY_ attractive body. Those muscles are enough to drive any sane girl up the wall.

But strangely, Torn found that he was having the exact same problems as the average Jak-fangirl.

You see, it all started last week…

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**FLASHBACK TIME!**

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Torn was not having a good day. For one thing, his best fighter (Jak) had been wounded while he was out on a mission, meaning that he'd be out of action for a few days to recover. And that meant that the rat (Daxter) would be hanging around ALL day, and ALL night.

Once Torn realized this, he couldn't help but insult said ottsel (I would tell you what the insult was, but if I did it'd turn this fic into an M-rating). So Daxter, in revenge, decided to relieve himself on the second-in-commands many maps that he had lieing around.

It was bold.

It was daring.

It was _gross_.

But it sure as hell got the job done.

And, unfortunately, it also ruined the maps. Which was bad for the Underground, because those maps showed every single tunnel that led to various important rooms in the Palace, rooms that could give Underground fighters very good positions to assassinate a certain Baron from Hell.

However, nothing make's a person feel better more than a nice hot shower. With that in mind, the tattooed elf made his way to the showers, determined to spend the rest of the day soaking in a bunch of hot water.

As he shuffled down the hall, he failed to hear the noises of another elf bathing himself. And he didn't realize some one was already in the showers till he opened the door…

And saw Jak—**ALL** of Jak. A lot more of Jak than he ever thought he'd see.

And suddenly, as his eyes gazed at the well toned, bandaged back of the blonde (complete with water droplets that were gliding down between his shoulder blades, which just kept sliding lower and lower and lower…), Torn didn't feel like he needed a hot shower anymore.

Oh, no.

Now he needed a very, VERY cold shower.

It took a while for Jak to notice that he was not alone. He turned around—exposing his lower region, which made Torn's, ah, condition even worse, and spotted the dread-locked, frozen elf.

The blonde's eyes widened slightly, mostly in surprised shock.

However, just as he muttered "Torn…", the ex-second-in-command had run right out the door, now determined to do something—_**ANYTHING**_—to get rid of his… Uh, "friend" that had decided to "pop up" (_literally)_ and let itself be known.

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**END OF FLASHBACK**

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So you see, ever since that little… Er, "incident," Torn hadn't been able to look Jak in the face.

The Tattooed Wonder knew his limits. And when it came to Jak, those limits were very… short. Lately, just _LOOKING_ at the blonde almost made the tattooed elf loose all of his self-control. His self-control was the only thing that was keeping him from jumping onto Jak and doing… Very intimate things with him.

What was he going to do now? Mission opportunities had been popping up less and less, leaving Jak to just hang around the Underground with Daxter. Usually, they'd talk, or they'd sleep. Sometimes, they'd play a game or two of 'Go Fish.'

But lately, Daxter had taken to going out and visiting a certain blonde bartender at the Hip Hog Heaven, leaving Jak ALL alone… With a certain lonely, lust-filled, tattooed elf named Torn…

Yeah, I know, that's a recipe for disaster.

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But let's forget about King Laryngitis for a few moments so we can focus on the hot blonde elf with the evil split personality. How did Jak feel about the incident?

Simple; he thought it was an accident. That's all. Jak figured that Torn had walked in on him by accident, and was now either very embarrassed, or very disgusted, heck, maybe both. In a way, it kind of made the blonde feel bad. In another… Well, he just didn't care. He didn't want it to ever happen again, but it was just an accident.

Nothing more, nothing less.

However, lately, things had been… Well, a bit strange. Ok, things had been very strange. Torn seemed to be distancing himself from Jak.

At first, Jak was confused. He and Torn had started to become friends. Well, not exactly friends, but more like acquaintances… Friendly acquaintances.

Then the blonde figured it was probably because the Tattooed Wonder had walked in on him in the showers. Jak figured that the tattooed elf would get over it in about a week, and everything would go back to normal.

But then, about five days after the "incident," Jak noticed that whenever he thought the blonde couldn't see him, Torn would watch him—no, _STARE_ at him. He'd never say anything, he'd just sit and STARE with those ice-blue eyes of his… Never blinking… Never moving… Just STARING.

To say the least, it REALLY creeped Jak out. You do not _stare _at a person (elf or not) for minutes on end. It's rude.

Once, when Jak caught Torn staring at him for the fifth time that day, Jak snapped his head up and looked Torn in the eye.

And let me tell you, he did NOT like the way Torn's usually bright eyes were dark. He didn't like the hungry look in the older elf's eyes. Hell, he didn't like that creepy glint he had. Jak didn't like any of that at all.

Unbeknownst to the blonde, there'd soon be a lot of things happening to him (courtesy of Torn) that he wouldn't like even more than those damn creepy eyes.

Poor Jak…

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**Alright, first chapter. I'm sorry if it doesn't really make any sense at some parts, but I'm high right now off of coke and chocolate doughnuts. Review and tell me what ya think! No flames please.**

**Kitty**


	2. KINKY

**Gasp! You like me! You really like me! Sniff, you don't know what this means to me… Well, you probably do, but whatever. Here's the thanks to the reviewers:**

**Sabulana: Glad you liked it! Here's the second chapter.**

**Meowen: Thanks for the review! **

**yes for 12: Um… Ok? Thanks for the review!**

**lioness of darkness: Oh, you shouldn't have said that thing about the camping trip… Hehe, you just gave me an idea…**

**TigerGoddess: Thanks for the review! Yeah, I know it's a bit weird, but… I'm a weird person! And this is a weird fic, with weird (yet hot) characters.**

**Dema: Glad you liked it! Here's the second chapter!**

**Nefertari22: Yay! I'm so happy that I got Torn and Jak down right. NO, I WILL NOT UP THE RATING, YOU DIRTY GIRL! If I did that, not as many people would see it…Though it is nice to imagine what they would do if I upped the rating…**

**Gothic Jak: Yay! Cookies! -is deliriously happy-**

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**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Jak and Daxter series…**

**Torn's Little Problem**

**Chapter 2: KINKY… (Be afraid! Be very afraid…)**

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_The room was humid._

_Slick skin met against slick skin._

_Soft, moist lips met against his own._

_His name was panted against his ear, the voice thick with passion. _

"_Torn, Torn, Torn… Torn!"_

"SHIT!"

The red-headed elf shot up from bed, sweating, panting, and donning a rather painful erection. The sheets of his bunk were twisted around his limbs, almost pinning him down.

Torn carefully untwisted himself, and sighed, trying to slow down his rapidly beating heart. He buried his face in his hands and tried to push out the images of his dream as they resurfaced into his mind.

It was the same dream. The same dream he'd been having of him and Jak, ever since he saw Jak—ALL OF JAK—in the shower. Damn that blonde and his perfect, muscled, and completely sexy body!

Every single night, he'd have that dream. And each night, it'd be more vivid than the last.

Torn sucked in his breath as the image of Jak running his hands up and down the dread-locked elf's chest resurfaced into his mind AGAIN.

"DAMMIT!" Torn shouted, slamming his head against the stone wall. He repeated this action a few more times in an attempt to rid himself of the erotic image. WHY was this happening to him? WHY? He hadn't done anything terribly wrong in his life. Sure he killed a few people, but so did tons of others, and look at how they were living; safe and warm in their little penthouses complete with indoor pools. Damn.

"DAMN, DAMN, DAMN!" he shouted to the ceiling.

He got no response.

The elf's "friend" was becoming rather painful, so Torn paused from smashing his head against the wall to get rid of it.

Let's see… What could he think of that was so horrifying, so _nasty,_ so horribly _DISGUSTING, _that it would completely turn him off and not remind him of that damned sexy blonde?

Hm… Daxter in a pink tutu? Nah, that was just hilarious, not sickening…

Daxter in a pink tutu while being molested by Erol? Again, funny—slightly disturbing, but funny.

Torn laid back against the headboard, racking his brain.

Daxter, in a pink tutu, being molested by Erol AND Praxis… With Erol and Praxis wearing itsy bitsy, teeney weeney, yellow polka dot bikinis?

Yup. THAT did it.

Torn sighed in relief as he felt himself go limp. If things didn't improve, he'd have to just not sleep at all. This was getting bad. Every time he closed his eyes, he'd either see Jak's wet, completely NAKED body, or he'd see Jak's sweating, naked body in bed as the blonde ran his hands all over the older elf's body.

The elf drooled as he pictured the last image, only with a few added details—like the strawberries, and the whipped cream, and all that chocolate syrup.

Then—

"DAMMIT!" Torn screamed as he went hard again. He slammed his head against the wall in frustration. It was a good thing no one else was there. Other wise, they'd have seriously worried for the red-head's sanity.

I know I do…

Sucking in his breath, Torn forced the image of the rat being molested by his two most hated enemies in their horrible bikinis back into his mind.

But this time, it didn't work.

Torn growled. Ok… That wasn't too bad, he just had to tweak the image a bit…

Hm… Daxter, in a pink tutu, being molested by Erol and Praxis as they wore itsy bitsy, teeney weeney, yellow polka dot bikinis… While Vin and Kor strip danced on some poles!

Torn sighed. That did the trick all right. While that sickening image would give him nightmares for a week, at least he'd gotten rid of his… "friend."

The dread-locked elf groaned, hoisted himself out of bed, and dragged himself to the showers.

Thank Mar that Jak would be gone for half the day. Other wise, Torn wasn't sure if he'd be able to resist the urge to drag that blonde over to the nearest bunk and do some traumatizing and KINKY things to him.

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Let's skip ahead to late afternoon and join our favorite blonde renegade. Jak was in a good mood. It had been a lovely day. He had killed thirteen metal heads, sixteen guards, and twenty three citizens, and escaped it all with minor scratches. Ah, mayhem was the perfect way to relieve all stresses. You should try it sometime. Grab your nearest chainsaw, go out, and kick some ass! It's refreshing, trust me.

Er, where was I? Oh yeah; as Jak was looking back onto his lovely day, he headed for the Underground. A big, important meeting was about to take place, and Jak had to be there.

Daxter had been complaining about it all the live-long day ("Why should we have to go to some stupid meeting? And since when do you listen to the Tattooed Wonder, eh? We could be going out and kicking some ass, or… Sitting around that statue and watching the babes go by… They're just so _jiggly,_ you know?"). However, Jak wanted to make amends with Torn, so he decided that for once, he would not be difficult, and decided to just go along with everything.

Besides, something useful might turn up.

As they entered the alleyway that the Underground resided in, Jak wondered vaguely if Torn would stare at him through the whole meeting.

The blonde shivered as the image of that dark-eyed Torn re-entered his mind. That image reminded him of Erol, back in the prison.

Jak entered the Underground, preparing himself for hours of boring, uneventful planning and discussion.

He saw the dread-locked elf leaning over a bunch of maps at the table, his back to the blonde and the ottsel. Ashelin was over in the corner, as was the "Shadow."

In the other corner, Jinx **(A/N: People, I haven't played Jak 2 in a while, so I forget if Jinx was in the second game or not. But if he's not, then let's pretend he is! Just use your IMAGINATION! -spreads hands widely over head-)** was leaning against the wall, puffing on that damned steroid-enhanced cancer stick of his, and beside him was Sig and Tess.

Now, Jak was HOPING that he could sneak by the older elf quietly and not alert him of his arrival, so that _MAYBE_ he could catch Torn off guard so they could make eye contact.

But no, Daxter didn't want to be invisible. He wanted people to know he was there.

"Hey, Tattooed Wonder!" the ottsel shouted as soon as they entered. Jak mentally groaned.

So much for stealth…

"What took you so long?" Torn asked without looking up from the maps.

"Hey! It ain't easy fighting off a bunch of freakin' metal heads and guards, King Laryngitis! We almost got ourselves killed!" He paused.

"…Until I bailed us out! Jak here was almost up to his neck in metal heads and guards, but I grabbed the nearest stick, and started swingin'—"

"I highly doubt that, rat," Torn interrupted dryly.

Sig snorted, Ashelin rolled her eyes, and Samos chuckled. Tess, however, was sympathetic.

"Oh Torn, don't be so mean!" she scolded as the rushed over and scooped Daxter up from Jak's shoulder, cuddling him.

"Ah, at least someone appreciates me," the ottsel sighed happily. Jak rolled his eyes, unaware that Torn was watching his every move hungrily.

The blonde did not realize that he tended to position his body into some rather attracted places. Like his hips; they weretilted slightly, the light hitting them just right, showing off his extremely nice… Ahem, well you get the idea.

"That's enough," Torn finally sighed, tearing his eyes away from Jak after 10 minutes of listening to Tess and the rat baby-talking each other.

"Indeed," the "Shadow" agreed. "It's time that we start this meeting. The sooner we can get some plans for Praxis's downfall, the sooner we can save this city.

Nodding, everyone gathered around the table, and the meeting started.

Unfortunately, because Fate felt like being an ass that day, Torn and Jak were sitting side by side, in front of the wall, and everyone else (including Daxter who had positioned himself between Tess's breasts, the pervert) was on the other side of the table.

Torn's heart pounded. He hadn't been this close to Jak since the "incident." He could SMELL the blonde, for crying out loud! They were that close. (This was because Jak was leaning forward slightly, at an angle, peering at some position on the map the Shadow was pointing out; Torn didn't need to do this because he and the Shadow had already discussed it.)

Torn closed his eyes briefly and took a deep breath. The blonde's scent washed over him; a mix of leather, soap, oil, and ottsel. Though the second-in-command could've done without that last one, Jak's scent somehow made him even MORE irresistible than before.

Then Jak leaned over more. This was almost Torn's undoing. The blonde's body was practically pressed up against his own; heck, Torn could feel the outline of Jak's calf through all of that thick material of the teen's pants.

'Dammit,' the redhead thought sluggishly. His hand itched to trace that calf… The more he resisted, the stronger the urge became.

'Aw hell,' he groaned mentally, and placed his hand lightly on Jak's leg.

It took a while for the blonde to notice that something was on his leg. When he did, he jumped about six feet in the air.

"Jak?" Ashelin asked, startled.

"I-it's nothing," the younger mumbled, the feeling having stopped. Everyone exchanged glances but continued with the meeting.

But Torn wasn't through yet. He went right back to tracing the blonde's leg, running his hand over every part.

Poor Jak. He was so confused. He didn't dare move again, because he didn't want to alert the other's; he didn't think that whatever it was would harm him.

Torn's keen ears picked up the sound of the blonde's breath hitching as the older elf ran his hand along the renegade's inner thigh. The redhead was in perv heaven.

Jak… Well, he was just too confused to even think. He KNEW it was a hand; the question was, who's was it? It couldn't be Ashelin's or Tess's; they wouldn't be able to reach him. He KNEW Sig, the Shadow, or Jinx wasn't doing this. Daxter definetly wasn't doing it. That left Torn…

Jak gulped. He tried to tell himself that wasn't true—Torn wasn't exactly fond of the him as far as Jak was concerned. The hand brushed lightly against the place in between Jak's legs.

The blonde made a small noise deep in his throat. But if it wasn't Torn… Then who was it?

Poor Jak.

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**Thank you all! Ok, now don't forget to review! Reviews help me update faster! And the faster I update, the faster I can get to all the good, perverted stuff! And I know most of you wouldn't want to miss out on THAT…**


	3. When Daxter's Away, Torn Shall Play

**YAY! I'VE GOT 23 REVIEWS NOW! FREE PASSES TO SEE TORN DOING PERVERTED AND KINKY THINGS TO JAK TO EVERYONE WHO REVIEWED MY SECOND CHAPTER!**

**Gothic Jak: Yes, Torn's hand is bad. And it isn't going to stop being bad for quite a while… -snickers evilly and hands you a free pass-**

**TigerGoddess- Yay! I'm glad you liked it. -hands you a pass- **

**talaandkailuver- Here's the update! And here's a pass for reviewing! -hands you a pass-**

**Ashley- Yay! I'm glad ya love it! A pass for you! -hands you pass-**

**TheOceansSoul69- Odd? I don't know what you mean… Well, yes I do. THANKS FOR REVIEWING! -hands you a pass-**

**Dema- Yes… Torn is a very, VERY bad boy. Aren't you Torn? Hehe, thanks for reviewing! -hands you pass-**

**Meowen- Know what's weird? Jinx reminds me of my uncle. Huh. Strange—he reminds you of your dad's brother and law, and he reminds me of my uncle… A pass for you! -hands you a pass-**

**Sabulana- Ooo, you got a new idea? POST IT CAUSE I WANNA READ IT! …You know, I never really thought of it as molesting Jak… O.O Yipe. Torn's mental images scared my mother too… Oh, and you don't have to be scared for my neighborhood. They're quite used to me, and are very fond of me. In fact, they're so fond of me, they're trying to get me a nice padded room in a very clean apartment building that gives you free jackets that don't let you move around any! Isn't that nice? -hands you a pass-**

**Kuro Kin'youbi- Hehehe… You'll find out… -snickers evilly and hands you pass-**

**yes for 12- Whee, I love being high on sugar! Thanks for reviewing! -hands you pass-**

**lioness of darkness- O.O -stares fearfully at army of chickens- Um… Good chickies. Nice chickies… Look, see, I'm typing! -throws you a pass and starts typing frantically-**

**Nefertari22- You think I'm evil? Really? YAY! THANK YOU! -beams happily and hands you a pass-**

**ILoveJak- Erm, yes, Torn is gay. Uh… Huh? Allegorical? AH! BIG WORD… BRAIN HURTS… MUST. FIND. DICTIONARY… -picks up random dictionary and looks word up- Allegorical…the language that says one thing but means another. -blinks- Huh? I'M CONFUSED NOW! -hands you a pass, clutching ice pack to head-**

**Raven Cactuar- Thanks for the review! -hands you pass-**

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**Warnings: THERE IS KISSING IN THIS CHAPTER. It's also got a some kinda-sorta-maybe slight OOC, lots of yaio themes, and other forms of violence. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I have never, will never, and currently do not own any of the Jak and Daxter series… But I am working on it! …Anyone wanna kill some Naughty Dog lawyers?**

**Torn's Little Problem**

**Chapter 3: When Daxter's Away, Torn Shall Play (everyone can thank lioness of darkness for this loverly idea…)**

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_**Bam!**_

_**Bam!**_

_**Bam!**_

_**Bam!**_

Torn was bashing his head against the wall repeatedly. He had just woken up from another erotic dream—this one featured himself, Jak, a piece of string, and a carrot. You do NOT want me to explain.

The tattooed elf sighed as he felt himself go limp. He had to do something. This was becoming dangerous. HE HAD MOLESTED THE BLONDE DURING A MEETING, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! True, this happened two weeks ago, and Jak had yet to tell anybody, but still. This had been going on for far too long.

The redhead sighed and pulled himself up from the bed wearily. He dragged himself across the room to the table covered by a huge map. He plopped himself down into his seat, and tried (desperately) to make heads or tails of anything on the piece of paper.

But for some reason, as Torn discovered as his eyes roamed over the many lines and circles that made absolutely no sense whatsoever, he realized that he really…

Truly…

Honestly…

…Didn't care. He didn't care. OH MY GOD, THE APOCALYPSE WAS COMING! TORN DID NOT CARE ABOUT ANYTHING CONCERNING CRAP THAT WOULD HELP THE UNDERGROUND IN IT'S FIGHT! THE END WAS COMING!

…Cough. Anyway, the only thing that he really gave a damn for at that moment was Jak and his body. The tattooed elf gritted his teeth as he tried desperately to fight back the image of the blonde doing… things… with the carrot and that damn piece of string.

Curse that stupid piece of string… And the way it caressed Jak's lips… Dangling from them so teasingly as the blonde ran his fingers up and down the length of—

_**"MAR MOTHER FUCKING DAMMIT!"**_

…Torn is not having fun, is he? I think we should leave him for a sec to check on Jak, what do ya say? You think so, too? Yes, that's a lovely idea.

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Jak blinked. And blinked. And blinked again. Then, for the fifteenth time, he read the note Sig had handed him that was supposedly sent to him by Daxter.

It read:

_Jak—_

_Me and Tess decided to go on a little camping trip up to Haven Forrest. __We would've invited ya, but y'know… The two of us need some… Bonding time. __Yeah. Well anyways, you understand, right? And don't worry—we'll be back in two days!_

_See ya later buddy,_

_Daxter_

Jak blinked again. And again. Then once more for good measure.

Then—

_**"WHO GOES ON A FREAKIN' CAMPING TRIP UP TO HAVEN FORREST THIS TIME OF YEAR?"**_ he shouted. Sig stared at him.

"…You ok?" the black elf finally asked. Jak looked up, startled. He'd been unaware that anyone else had been in the room.

"Uh, yeah. I'm fine," he muttered, crunching the paper up in his hand before throwing it in the trash.

But honestly, who goes to Haven City in the summer time? It's always full of metal heads and nasty things then—It's better to go during fall or spring. Still, this _is _Daxter we're talking about, and we all know that he was dropped on his head at least three times after birth.

"So Cherrie, what're you gonna do now that the rat is gone?" Sig asked as he polished his beloved Peacemaker.

Jak pondered this. What WOULD he do? The poor guy groaned, because he realized that since Daxter was gone, he'd be left alone with Torn… FOR TWO WHOLE DAYS.

Now, ever since the meeting and the mysterious little hand that had invaded his person, Jak had let Daxter do all the talking when they were around Torn. Jak wasn't angry… He was just cautious. I mean, if it HAD been Torn—which Jak was sure it wasn't!—then who knew what was going on in that creepy little mind of his? I mean, really.

The blonde shuddered as he remembered the feel of that hand running up and down his leg.

If that had been Torn's hand… The blonde bit back a groan.

'**Having dirty thoughts again, Jak?' **the blonde's dark personality—aka Dark Jak—chuckled evilly inside his head.

'Shut up,' the renegade retorted mentally, groaning.

'**Jak! I'm hurt. After everything that I've done for you,'** Dark said in mock hurt.

Jak snorted. 'Oh, and just what have you done for me, huh, Dark? Answer me that.'

**'What about all those times that I bailed your sorry ass out—you and the rat's, huh? Like last week when you were ambushed by a group of KG's… Who was the one that ripped every single guard to shreds? Hm?'**

Jak gritted his teeth together. Dark laughed cruelly.

**'That's right—ME. But back to business… Why are you so concerned about Torn?'**

'I'm NOT concerned, I'm just cautious. I mean, if it HAD been Torn—'

'**That would've made you happy, right?'**

'Yes—I mean NO. I mean—'

**'Hm, so indecisive…'**

'SHUT IT!'

'**I'm sorry—Is that _ANGER _I hear? You might wanna be careful, Jak… You know what happens when you get pissed off…'**

Jak shuddered. Yeah. He knew what happened all right. Dark chuckled again, making Jak grit his teeth even harder.

'**Jak, Jak, Jak… You can't run from the truth forever. Eventually you're gonna have to admit to yourself that you feel something for him.'**

'I AM NOT GAY!'

'**Aw, Jak, don't think of it as being gay. Think of it as being… Experimental. Curious, if you will.'**

'I AM NOT CURIOUS! I AM NOT GAY! STOP PLAYING MIND GAMES!'

By now, Dark was having himself a grand old time. It was just so easy to get Jak riled up!

'**Mind games? Dear me, Jak, how could you make such an accusation?'**

'DIE!' was the blonde's mental reply as he grabbed his gun. Blocking his dark personality out, he stood abruptly (startling Sig, who had been staring at him and wondering whether or not the blonde had finally cracked) and stormed out.

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Well, I think it's safe for us to go back and enjoy the company of Torn—

**_"MAR DAMMIT! DAMN YOU, JAK! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HEAD, DAMMIT!"_**

…Never mind.

Oh look! Here comes Jak! Wait… Jak in the same room with a lust-filled, hostile Torn…

Oh dear lord in heaven. RUN JAK, RUN!

Jak entered the Underground, his heart pounding against his ribcage. He didn't know why he was so nervous.

As he walked into the room, he saw that a certain tattooed elf was hunched over the table, panting. Jak rushed to his side.

"Torn? Torn, what's wrong? Were you—"

But Jak never did get to finish his sentence. Because in the blink of an eye, Torn whipped around, grabbed the younger elf by the collar, slammed him against the table, and pressed his lips down hungrily against the blonde's.

Now, Jak was a brave, brave elf. He'd gone up against herds of metal heads, flocks of lurkers, dozens of Krimzon Guards, and hell, he'd even been forced to wear a pink dress and lived to tell about it (although this happened at Sandover and he never did tell anyone about it, but that's a story for another day).

But he had never, EVER been kissed before. And he had NEVER expected it would be from Torn. So he was nervous, and slightly scared, which is understandable.

Dark just thought this was hilarious.

**'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA—'**

Ya see?

In his daze, the blonde vaguely acknowledged the fact that Torn was running one hand up and down his chest.

Torn suddenly jerked back, panting and glaring at the younger.

"Damn you, Jak," he growled, giving the blonde a little shake. "Damn you!"

The blonde could only blink. He was having mixed feelings. On one hand, he was completely confused, scared, and nervous. On another, he was deliriously happy.

Torn slammed his mouth against the blonde's once more, but this time, Jak returned the kiss.

**(A/N: Alright, so it gets kinda graphic here. If you don't wanna read, then please, skip right by it, by all means. If not… Well, then enjoy you little perverts!)**

Torn nibbled at the blonde's lower lip before slowly dragging his tongue across the wounded flesh. Jak moaned and opened his mouth to the older elf's.

Their tongues battled, each one trying to gain dominance. But as we all know, Torn is not one to be beaten. He made it very clear that HE was the one in charge.

Jak's body jolted as Torn dragged his fingers up and down the area of the place in between Jak's legs. The blonde's groans grew louder, and continued to intensify as Torn pressed himself against the younger elf.

Jak was all to aware of something hard pressing against his thigh. He sucked in his breath quickly, jolts of arousal running up and down his spine.

**(A/N: Alright, it's done! You can continue reading now.)**

Unfortunately for the two, they were soon interrupted by the door opening. The two jumped away—Jak launching himself onto the nearest bunk and Torn throwing himself behind the table.

The intruder walked into the dim light. It was Ashelin. She stared at the two red faced men, looking from one to the other.

"Yes?" Torn all but growled. He was sexually frustrated. And you would not like Torn when he was sexually frustrated, oh hell no.

Ashelin raised her eyebrows. "I have some information that I thought you'd want," she explained slowly, studying her ex's glazed eyes.

Torn grunted as he realized what he—they—had just done.

"What is it?" he asked, his breathing returning to normal as his heart slowed down, the red in his face fading.

Shaking her head before shooting the tattooed elf a suspicious look, Ashelin proceeded to explain something about a shipment of eco and a group of metal heads.

As they talked, Jak kept shooting looks to Torn. However, the older elf didn't even spare him a second glance.

* * *

**There. They kissed. Are you people happy now? BUT! This doesn't mean they're officially together. They still haven't gone through that denial phase. Now personally, I thought this chapter sucked. I'll probably go through and edit it later. Well, review and tell me what you think! **


	4. What A Loverly Mission

**Reasons the author hasn't updated:**

**1) She's been on vacation (literally).**

**2) Her father is close-minded and refused to let her on the computer after finding out she was writing a story about two gay guys.**

**The following is a note from Kitty Kat-chan as she is on the beach, during her vacation:**

**Aloha! Hey everybody. Well, her I am, at Myrtle Beach with my family, under my big ol' umbrella, watching the waves. Hehe… I guess I kinda forgot to tell you that we were going on vacation, huh? Yeah…**

**Um, is it too late to say I'm sorry? -sees readers evil glares and their armies of chickens and chinchillas- Um… I guess so…**

**Well, look, I am thinking about ya! Really! I mean, I'm writing another chapter on the beach when I could be playing in the waves, or getting a tan, or watching hot boys go by… -watches a group of hot guys longingly-**

**But no, I'm writing another chapter, just to make you guys happy. You guys better leave me some good reviews!**

**That's an order!**

**ON WITH THE CHAPTER!**

* * *

**Warnings: Jak tells Daxter how he feels about Torn, and Daxter gets a little mushy when he talks about Tess. Oh, and beware for a bit of insanity too. **

**Disclaimer: No, I do not own Jak and Daxter... Still working on it...**

**Torn's Little Problem**

**Chapter 4: Oh, What A Loverly Mission**

* * *

Three days had passed since Torn and Jak kissed. 

And to say the least, things weren't going too well for Jak.

Torn barely spoke to him. When he did speak, it was usually to give them a mission, or to tell them to keep it down, he was trying to sleep/work/get rid of this damn migraine!

And whenever Jak tried to talk to the older elf about the kiss, Torn would suddenly send them on a mission—sometimes, it'd be a logical mission. And other times, it'd be completely crazy. Like at that moment, when Torn had sent Jak and Daxter out to milk one of Baron Praxis's yakkows to get some… well, milk.

Daxter sighed as he watched his friend milk the biggest yakkow in the pen as he leaned against the wall among all the bodies of any KG who dared to stand in the elf's way.

"Jak," the ottsel finally said. "You and I have been friends all our lives, right?"

"Yup," Jak said.

"So…. If anything was going on, you'd tell me about it…. Right?" the ottsel continued.

"Yeah…" the blonde-green elf said slowly, suspicious to what his friend was getting at.

"Alright. Then what's going on between you and Torn?"

The question startled the blonde elf. In fact, it startled him so bad, that he accidentally pulled one of the yakkow's udders too hard.

With an angry "MOO!" the yakkow swung his Almighty-and-Powerful-Tail-of-DOOM, and proceeded to bitch-slap poor, unsuspecting Jak.

**SMACK!**

**SMACK!**

**SMACK!**

**SMACK!**

Jak fell over, dazed. Daxter rushed to his friend.

"Jak! Are you ok? Speak to me, man!"

The blonde-green elf sat up slowly, holding his jaw. He winced.

"Yeah… I think so."

Daxter waited till he was sure his friend was well enough to answer his question before speaking up.

"So… What's going on?"

Jak sighed. How was he supposed to explain this?

"Dax," he began, crossing his legs so he could sit Indian-style, keeping a weary eye on the yakkow. "How… uh, how do you feel about Tess?"

Daxter blinked. "Huh?"

"Just answer the question, Dax."

The ottsel crossed his arms and closed his eyes, a small smile on his face.

"She's… She's a great girl. She doesn't treat me like some animal. She treats me like a normal elf—except with fur and paws and a tail, y'know."

He paused, opening his eyes to stare at the wall, his smile turning dreamy.

"She always seems so happy to see me, y'know? And I dunno… It just makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Especially when I see her laugh."

Jak stared at his friend out of the corner of his eye. This was the first time he'd never seen this side of his ottsel friend, and in all honesty, it was really starting to freak him out.

Daxter noticed the stare. He nodded. "Yeah, I know I don't act like I care for her. But I really do. I mean, how many people do you think would love an elf-turned-ottsel, huh? Not many, lemme tell you, buddy. She just… Takes all the pain away for me."

The ottsel turned his gaze to the ceiling, misty-eyed. Jak watched his love-struck friend, amazed, and slightly creeped out.

"When I'm with her," Daxter continued quietly. "Even though I act all crazy and tell those wacky stories and stuff, I forget all the bad crap I've gone through. And for a while, even though it's only for a little bit, I can actually feel happy, and care-free, because I know I'm making her smile."

The ottsel suddenly looked at Jak.

"So what were you gonna tell me, Jak?" he asked.

'Here goes nothing,' Jak said to himself, groaning mentally.

"That's… Well, that's kinda how I feel about Torn, Dax," the blonde elf mumbled. "I've never told him or anything," he added quickly. "And we haven't had any of those… Er, moments you and Tess are always having, but still…"

Daxter stared at his life-long friend in shock.

"You… You're in love with Tattooed Wonder? King Laryngitis? The Walking Popsicle?" he asked feebly in a dazed voice. Jak nodded, his head bowed.

For a brief moment, the ottsel just sat there in shock.

"Ok," he said finally. "I kinda saw this coming. I didn't really expect you to love Tattoo Face, but I basically saw this coming."

Relieved, Jak lifted his head and smiled at the ottsel. Daxter stood and walked over to his blonde friend, and sat on his knee.

"So… Does he know how you feel?" the ottsel asked.

Jak shrugged weakly.

"I'm not sure," he said. "I mean, he was the one who kissed me first—"

"WHAT?" Daxter screamed in shock, his eyes wide.

The ottsel's hands flew to his eyes as he crouched down, shaking his head furiously.

"TOO MUCH INFO! BAD MENTAL IMAGE! _BAD MENTAL IMAGE!_" he shouted.

"_Would you keep it down?" _Jak hissed, looking around wearily.

Even the yakkow seemed to find this disgusting. It was leaning down and hiding it's face in it's hooves, moaning as if in pain.

"Oh, shut up," Jak muttered to the two moaning animals.

"Sorry," the ottsel whispered straightening.

It was silent for awhile, till Daxter decided to speak again.

"So… You've kissed?"

Jak nodded.

"And you liked it?"

Jak nodded again.

"Did he like it?"

The blonde hesitated, then nodded slowly, mumbling, "Yeah… I think so."

Daxter wasn't quite sure what to say.

Jak sighed again. "It's so complicated Daxter. We only kissed once, but now he's giving me the cold shoulder, and… Giving us these really strange missions," he added the last part dryly, holding up the milk pail that had yet to be filled.

"Ok," the ottsel said slowly, his shock finally wearing off. Then he grinned.

"So… He's the dude, then?"

Jak gave the ottsel a weird look.

"Of course he's a dude," the blonde sighed. "Daxter, I'm not sure you really understand—"

"No, I understand," Daxter broke in. "Sometimes _you're _the dude, sometimes _he's _the dude… Sometimes your _both _the dude—"

"DAXTER!" Jak shouted in frustration.

"What?" the ottsel cried, clueless.

The blonde elf sighed, giving up.

"Nothing… C'mon, let's just get this over with and go back…"

The blonde turned to the yakkow, and proceeded to milk the rather irritated yakkow.

* * *

"There… That wasn't so bad," Jak said as he and the ottsel began to walk out.

However, the yakkow seemed to have other ideas…

Said yakkow suddenly jumped up, landing on his two feet… er, hooves, in front of the duo, and going into some sort of a kung fu stance. Jak and Daxter stared.

"Oh my Mar—" Daxter said dazedly. But he never got to finish, because in the next instant, he and Jak were kicked straight across to the other side of the barn by the temperamental yakkow.

"What the hell?" Jak shouted, twitching as he laid there on the ground, temporarily paralyzed.

"My spine…" Daxter groaned weakly in his ear.

Once Jak got control back over his body, he pulled himself up—only to discover that all the other yakkows had decided to help their comrade, and were now in similar kung fu poses.

_**"MOO-HA!"**_ all seven yakkows shouted (or mooed) together, simultaneously lifting one hoof and leaping into the air.

_"JAK, DO SOMETHING!"_ Daxter screamed.

The blonde looked around wildly for something that would help him. He saw nothing.

**POW! SMACK! CRUNCH!**

All of the yakkows descended down upon the duo, and proceeded to beat the living crap out of them.

_"Jaaaa—OW!—aaaaak!"_ wailed Daxter as a yakkow smacked him against the ground, it's tail wrapped around the ottsel's body. "Do—OUCH!—something!"

**SNAP!**

_"MY ARM!"_

Said blonde, however, was in no position to help his friend, because he was too busy being used as a volleyball by the remaining six yakkows.

Finally, the yakkows grew bored with their little games, and threw their victims onto the ground.

"Oomph!" the blonde grunted feebly, his body aching. The yakkows advanced towards the fallen duo menacingly.

Despite his outward appearance, Jak had a plan.

As soon as the evil yakkows were close enough, the blonde renegade whipped out his trusty gun, and shot rapidly at the yakkows.

_**BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM!**_

The yakkows dropped like flies.

The creatures slumped over on the ground, mooing in pain for a few brief moments before they entered the land where all deceased kung fu-fighting yakkows go after they die… Yeah…

Jak sat up wearily, holding Daxter in one arm.

"What in Mar's name was _THAT?_" the ottsel hissed, eyeing the dead yakkows evilly. Jak could only shake his head in response. He limped over to the abandoned milk pail—which surprisingly hadn't lost any of it's milk—picked it up, and limped towards the door.

"I dunno Dax… But hopefully, that's the last thing we'll run into here."

Oh, how wrong he was.

* * *

"Here's your… milk," Jak muttered, dropping the pail onto Torn's desk.

Torn raised his eyebrow as he studied the duo.

Daxter had two black eyes, a clipped ear, and numerous bruises all over his body. His right arm and left leg were in casts, and he used two tiny crutches to help support him so he could stand.

Jak wasn't much better. His face was sporting a rather large bruise on his left cheek, while the rest of his body was decorated in cuts, scrapes, more bruises, and blood.

"Do I need to ask?" the redhead asked dryly, refusing to look Jak in the eye.

"No, you don't," Jak muttered, wanting nothing more than to fall into bed and sleep for a looooong time.

Daxter, however, wanted to give the tattooed elf a piece of his mind.

"Why didn't you tell us those cows knew kung fu?" he shouted.

Torn didn't answer though his shoulders shook from concealed laughter. Daxter continued.

"We got there, we fought the guards, we milked the biggest yakkow we could find, we're just about to leave, and THEN what happens?"

The ottsel didn't wait for the redhead to answer.

"Those yakkows suddenly jump up and start using kung fu on us! We could've been _KILLED!_ By _YAKKOWS! _Didn't you even think to warn us?" Do you know what it's like to get sent flying across the room from a 400-something pound yakkow kicking ya?"

Torn dug his nails into his palm and bit his tongue, his shoulders shaking harder.

"But of course you knew we'd beat those yakkows," Daxter said sarcastically, glaring at the redhead through narrowed, swollen eyes. "But I guess you forgot about the _CHICKENS_, didn't you?"

Again, the ottsel didn't wait for a reply.

"As if we weren't bruised and bloodied enough! We walk out of the stupid barn, and we're headin' to the zoomer, and suddenly, we're attacked by a bunch of chickens—_WHO WERE WEILDING KNUMCHUCKS!"_

Torn dug the tip of his dagger into his palm.

_He would not laugh, he would not laugh, he would not laugh, he would not laugh…_

"And just when we finish with the chickens, Mar Almighty, here come the pigs, who obviously have _BLACKBELTS_ in karate! But let's not forget about the roosters with _KNIVES_ for talons, or the ducks that had _BULLETS_ comin' out o' their beaks, and Mar forbid we forget about the sheep that had (1) _FREAKIN' LASER BEAMS ATTACHED TO THEIR_ _HEADS!_" Daxter roared, hopping from one foot to the other in rage.

It was true. Praxis made sure that his farm animals knew how to protect themselves.

_"NEXT TIME,"_ Daxter shouted, hopping down from Jak's shoulder painfully and lifting his good arm to point at the redhead, "you can go and get _YOUR OWN_ stinkin' milk! Do your own shopping for a change!"

And with that, the little ottsel hopped off the table and hobbled out in the most dignified way he could, pausing by the door only to give his crutch a threatening swing in Torn's direction before heading out.

Unable to contain himself any longer, Torn burst out laughing.

Jak stood there, watching the man he was in love with laugh his head off… Which was kinda creepy when you think about it, because Torn his such a badass and he rarely shows emotion.

As he stood there, watching, a strange feeling ran through him. It was a warm, fuzzy feeling, and it was… kinda nice…

'Is this how Daxter feels?' the blonde thought to himself as he watched the tattooed elf fall straight over, clutching his sides as he laughed hysterically… Which is just wrong…

Jak snapped.

Before he knew what he was doing, he had the older elf pinned against the ground and was kissing him senseless.

At first, Torn tried to break free. But eventually, desires overcame pride, and soon Torn had Jak pinned to the ground instead.

Torn ran his hands up and down the younger elf's body, encouraged by the blonde's moans and whimpers.

Their tongues battled for dominance as they each tried to tear the other's shirt off.

Torn's shirt was the first to be discarded (more like shredded).

Jak ran his fingers up and down the older elf's well-toned chest, causing Torn to groan loudly.

Impatient, Torn ripped the blonde's shirt off, eager to do some of his own exploring.

The two continued kissing, moaning, and touching late into the night, unaware of the many trials and insanity that lay ahead…

* * *

**(1) I kinda stole this from the first Austin Power's movie (which I do not own). So just picture Daxter imitating Dr. Evil when you read that… Yeah…**

**So anyways, review and tell me what you think! Now if you don't mind, my PS2 and Jak 3 game are calling me. TTFN!**


	5. It's Getting Hot In Here

**Alright, so right now, I've got absolutely no inspiration. But what the hell, I'm gonna wing it anyway! But I just wanna say sorry ahead of time if this chapter really sucks (which it probably will).**

**ebonywolfspirit-084: Yay! I'm glad it made you laugh! Here's the fifth chapter!**

**TigerGoddes: Um, sorry, but I don't think Jak's gonna keep his hands off of Torn… And yes, I did hear about the new game! I'm kinda pissed off about it though; the guy who did Damas's voice in the third game is gonna be doing Torn's voice in the new one. THAT SERIOUSLY SUCKS!**

**Kiriona: Like I said before, you've gained more respect from me for taking the review I sent you so well. Another cookie for you! (hands you cookie)**

**lioness of Darkness: Hehe… Good chickens. I've updated! See? Hehe… (scoots away nervously)**

**Meowen: Whee, thank you! I couldn't help but put that Austin Powers part in…**

**Ashley: (blushes) Oh, I'm sure it's not the funniest thing… But thank you anyway! I'm glad you thought it was so funny!**

**Beastfire: Um, yeah. You might wanna watch out for the yakkows… They're pretty temperamental… Thankies for the review!**

**Gothicjak: I'm sorry I ended it so soon, but my dad walked into the room. And I've already told you guys how close-minded my father is… (rolls eyes)**

**Anime-Artest: o.O (gives you the Heimlich maneuver)**

**shadows-of-flame: You think it's awesome? Really? Yay! Thank you! XD**

**Raven Cactuar: A cookie for you because you recognized where I got the kung-fu yakkows from! (hands you cookie) And your welcome… Oh well. At least I got to relax in a nice hot tub most of the time!**

**A Bloody Puppet: (nods) Yes, doesn't it suck? I wish my dad hadn't found out… But what can ya do, right? Here's the next chapter!**

**Not Tellin': Thanks for the review!**

**M-python-girl: (stares at legions nervously) Please… Don't sick the rabbits on me… Or the religious fanatics…**

**yes for 12: -sweatdrops as she watches Errol- Oh dear. Um, you're welcome! Glad you liked the chapter! Nah, no girl/girl relationships. Can't write those. –shudders- I have nothing against gay girls, but I just can't write or read yuri.

* * *

**

**Disclaimer: No, I do not own the Jak trilogy. If I did, I'd be ridiculously rich right now. And I wouldn't be writing fanfiction. I'd be busy pairing Jak and Torn up in the oncoming game. So there.**

**Torn's Little Problem**

**Chapter 5: It's Getting Hot In Here**

* * *

"…So we're going to have to sneak around to the back and take them by surprise," Ashelin explained, using a pointer to point things out on the map hanging on the wall.

The Shadow had called yet another meeting to discuss the plan for taking an eco-mining sight by surprise. Everyone was present; Torn, Jak, Daxter, Tess, the Shadow, Sig, Jinx, Kor, and of course, the Kid. Of course, her mind wasn't really on the task at hand—and neither were two other's minds apparently.

The redheaded woman watched silently as Torn and Jak snuck gazes at each other when they were sure the other wasn't looking. This was bothering her. What the hell was going on with them?

She sighed. This was stressing her out. Why was she even worried about it? She and Torn weren't going out anymore. She felt nothing but sisterly affection for him—right? Right.

But as she watched the two men catch each other's eyes and smile at each other (though you could barely tell Torn was smiling), she felt the tiniest pricks of jealousy. She and Torn had never done anything like that when they were going out!

"Is that all?" the Shadow asked loudly, breaking into her thoughts. Ashelin looked up and nodded.

"Yes."

The aging rebel nodded. "Good. Then this meeting has now officially come to an end. We will attack the sight in exactly three days. Everyone get some sleep, and we will discuss ways on get in tomorrow."

Everyone stood and stretched, talking in low voices. Ashelin sighed and rubbed her temples. She barely acknowledged Tess as the blonde bade her goodbye before leaving with Sig, Jinx, and Daxter (who had decided to 'guard Tess' for the night, and possibly get a little booze as he did so).

"Ashelin?"

The redhead looked up to see her ex staring at her with just the faintest glimmer of concern in his ice-blue eyes.

"Are you ok?" he asked softly, placing one hand on her shoulder.

Ashelin forced a smile on her face. "I'm fine. It's just a little headache."

She mentally winced. Bad lie. Torn obviously knew she wasn't telling the truth, but he nodded anyway. He knew from experience that if Ashelin didn't want to tell someone something, she wouldn't tell them till she wanted to.

The redhead sighed and set the pointer down. The Shadow walked up to her.

"That was a very good plan, my dear," the short elf said, staring intently at her through those crazy glasses. "I was very impressed. However, I couldn't help but notice that there was something else on your mind. Care to tell…?"

Ashelin sighed again. Life was just too hard sometimes. As much as she wanted to say there was nothing wrong, she knew that she wasn't fooling anybody.

"I'm worried about Torn," she confided softly, watching her ex converse with Jak over in the corner. The Shadow raised an eyebrow in surprise.

"Torn? Why? Is there something wrong with him?"

Ashelin shook her head. "No… Not really… At least, I don't think so anyway…" She sighed and shook her head. "It's complicated.

The Shadow chuckled. "All things in life are complicated, my dear. Some things just make more since than others." The elf placed on hand on the troubled woman's arm. "Come now, sit down and tell me what's troubling you."

The two rebels sat down on the nearest bunk, and Ashelin proceeded to explain her feelings.

"I don't know if you've noticed this, but Torn and Jak seem to have gotten pretty close," she began slowly. The Shadow nodded.

"Yes, they do seem to be on very friendly terms, don't they?" he said thoughtfully. Ashelin nodded.

"Yes. But you see, I think… This may seem kind of silly, but I think they're more than just friends," she muttered, studying her shoes intently. The Shadow's face darkened a bit.

"You think they love each other?" he asked bluntly. Refusing to meet his eyes, Ashelin gave a tiny nod. The Shadow folded his arms.

"What's so bad about that?" he asked. Ashelin looked up in surprise.

"Don't you get it? They might be in _**LOVE**._ Two men might be in _**LOVE**_. With _**EACH OTHER**_."

The sage nodded. "Yes. I understand that. But what I don't understand is why you have a problem with it. Now, I know your father has placed a strict band on homosexuality, but I clearly remember you stating how much you hated that law. Why have you changed your opinions now?"

The redhead lowered her gaze back to the floor, shrugging weakly.

"I… I don't know."

The sage chuckled. "Well, I think I know. You're jealous."

Ashelin's head snapped up. She glared at the old elf, anger coursing through her veins. How dare he accuse her of jealousy?

"I am not jealous!" she said through clenched teeth. "I just don't think it's right for Torn to be in love with someone else!" Her eyes widened as she realized what she just said, and she quickly closed her mouth.

The Shadow waved his finger, as if she was a child and he was scolding her.

"That sounds like jealousy to me, my dear."

Ashelin lowered her head, shamefaced. "I know," she sighed.

The Shadow patted her arm sympathetically. "I know how hard it can be to let someone go. I was young and in love once too, you know. But if you keep holding on to someone who's already put the past behind them and moved on, you'll only succeed in hurting yourself. Possibly each other."

Ashelin didn't respond, choosing instead to pick at a stray thread on her pants leg. The Shadow sighed.

"You have to let Torn go, Ashelin. You have to let go of the past, and look to the future. Torn has found someone else. If he loves Jak—"

"He doesn't love Jak," Ashelin retorted softly. "Torn isn't gay. I know he isn't." The sage shook his head.

"Ashelin, please. Don't make this difficult! You have to face the facts; Torn is homosexual, and—"

"No!" Ashelin shouted, standing up abruptly. Torn and Jak stopped talking and looked at the normally calm, cool, and collected woman.

"It's not true!" Ashelin spat, glaring at the Shadow. "I'll prove to you that it's not true! I will!"

And with that, the redhead stormed out of the Hideout.

* * *

The three men stared after her in silence for a moment.

"What was that all about?" Jak finally asked, looking quite confused. The sage shook his head, locking the door quickly.

"It was nothing, Jak. Don't worry about it. You and Torn just get some sleep… Crazy girl… Hope she doesn't do anything stupid…" Muttering to himself, the sage lifted one of the posters and exited through the trick door into the hallway to his room.

Jak and Torn stared after him silently for a bit.

"Everyone's going crazy," Torn finally decided, voicing his thoughts out loud. Jak nodded.

"Yup. It seems so."

Then they looked at each other. A sly smile slowly spread across Jak's face.

"Looks like we're all alone now…" he stated softly. Torn's face was graced with a similar (though much more scary) smile.

"Looks like it," he agreed as he began walking around the bed to the blonde.

"No missions tonight…" Jak continued, watching his lover approach.

"No more meetings…" Torn added, only a few feet away.

"No interruptions…" the blonde added, his eyes getting darker as the older elf approached.

"No annoying rat…" the redhead said dryly, he and the blonde now only a few inches apart.

Jak opened his mouth, probably to defend his friend, but Torn didn't give him the chance. The redhead crushed his mouth against the blonde's, pushing the younger elf against the wall roughly.

Jak groaned, wrapping his arms around the older elf's torso, battling for dominance. Torn, however, would have none of that. HE was the dominant one. Jak didn't seem to realize this yet.

The redhead smirked. 'Time for a little lesson,' he thought smugly.

The blonde groaned loudly, his eyes rolling back into his head as the older elf began to nip at the blonde's neck.

Torn inwardly smirked as he listened to the blonde groan. He continued to nip the blonde's neck, sucking at the skin as he did so. After a few minutes of this, the redhead (or is it brunette?) changed tactics.

"Torn!" the blonde gasped as the older elf's tongue traced the red bite marks he had left behind. Jak gripped the older elf's shoulders tightly, feeling his knees buckle.

The tattooed elf moved from the blonde's neck to his ears.

Jak closed his eyes and moaned as Torn traced the shell of his ear with his tongue languidly. The older elf the switched back to his earlier tactic, delicately nipping the sensitive flesh of the blonde's ear.

Mind clouded with lust, Jak quickly yanked the older elf down onto the bunk. The blonde rolled over so that he was on top.

He smiled toothily at the older elf before getting his revenge. He began his own onslaught of nips and kisses on the tattooed elf's neck. Torn groaned, his eyes closed in pleasure.

The two then proceeded to do things that married couples usually do in the privacy of their bedrooms, but I cannot tell you exactly WHAT they did because then the rating would change to NC-17.

So let's just say that the two of them… Uh… Wrestled. Yes, that's it! They wrestled in the nude and… Uh… Played horsie… Yeah… Let's just flash forward to the next morning, shall we? You agree? Yes, that's a good idea…

* * *

Cough… Uh, right. So it's the next morning.

The Shadow woke up in a grand old temper. Stalkingthrough the trick door, he entered the main room to find Jak clearing the table of all maps, cups, pens, etc.

"Good morning, Samos!" Jak said cheerily—well, he said it in the most cheery way he could, which isn't saying much…

The Shadow scowled. Oh great. The blonde was in a disgustingly good mood. That made the sage even grumpier.

"What's so good about it?" he grumbled, stalking towards his seat.

"Looks like somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed," the blonde said dryly. The sage grunted. Jak shrugged.

"Well come over here and help me set the table for breakfast, and maybe you'll get in a better mood," the blonde ordered, setting down plates, cups, forks, and other eating utensils. The Shadow's eye twitch.

"And since when do you people eat breakfast under this roof?" he snapped. Jak shrugged again.

"We don't. But Torn was in a pretty good mood this morning, and he decided that he'd make pancakes, so…" The blonde began to study the table as if it were the most interesting thing in the world. The sage looked closely, and saw that the blonde's face was beet red.

'What?' the sage wondered in confusion. 'Why the hell is Jak blush—' His eyes widened. 'Oh Mar, they did **IT**. _**THAT'S**_ what all those thumping noises were… And the groaning…' The sage closed his eyes and shuddered.

In all honesty, he had just thought that Jak was going through a bad case of diarrhea, because of the groans. Now, however, the old elf was starting to see the light.

'How the heck do two men do that anyway?' the sage wondered, shuddering again.

The kitchen door opened, and Torn walked into the room carrying a plate of warm, fluffy golden pancakes.

"Mornin'," he grunted to the Shadow. The sage felt his shock fading as his bad temper returned. Torn only wished someone 'good morning' if he woke up in a good mood. So Jak was telling the truth. But Torn must've been in a _**REALLY**_ good mood if he had made breakfast.

'Well, the noises didn't stop till about 5:00 this morning,' the sage reminded himself.

"Hmph! I'm not hungry!" the Shadow declared out loud. "I'll be in my office working on plans!" He stomped towards the door, his head barely visible above the edge of the table.

Once he reached the door to his office, he yanked it open and stormed in, but not before whirling around to face the two elves, shouting, **_"DON'T BOTHER ME! KEEP IT DOWN TODAY SO I CAN THINK!"_**

He slammed the door shut. Torn and Jak stared at the door, blinking.

"Guess he doesn't want any pancakes," Jak said finally with a tiny shrug. Torn nodded, and the two proceeded to sit down and have a romantic little meal for two…

That is, until Daxter came running in…

* * *

_**"HELLO, LOVEBIRDS!"**_ the tiny ottsel shouted at the top of his lungs as he skipped through the door. The two elves in question jumped about six feet into the air.

"Daxter!" Jak shouted, trying to regain his breath. Said ottsel, however, was unable to reply, because he was too busy being throttled by Torn.

"What the hell did you call us, rat?" the tattooed elf hissed, squeezing the ottsel's throat tightly.

"Choking—not breathing—need oxygen—" the ottsel managed to gasp. Jak grabbed the older elf's arm.

"Torn, let him go," the blonde commanded. Torn looked down at the shorter elf, his face contorted in anger.

"Did you hear what he called us? How'd he figure it out?" he whispered fiercely.

Jak shrugged. "I told him," he replied meekly.

**THUMP.**

"Air…" Daxter wheezed, now sprawled out on the floor. Torn was now glaring at the blonde.

"You told him?" he spat.

"He came right out and asked! What was I supposed to do? Lie?" the blonde retorted, getting angry as well.

"_**YES!**_ You should have lied!" Torn snapped.

"Well, I didn't!" Jak retorted, folding his arms with a pout.

'Not the pout…' the tattooed elf groaned mentally. That pout always… Er… Let's just say it got him 'in the mood.'

"Hey, Tattooed Wonder," a now recovered Daxter said, hopping onto the table.

"What?" the redhead growled, preparing himself for the taunts he was sure would come.

"Look," Daxter said, trying to sound reasonable. "I don't care if you and Jak go out. Just as long as you treat him right, I'm happy. Ok? No, I'm not gonna make fun of ya," he added, seeing the look on Torn's face.

"I just want Jak to be happy. And though I can't say much about his taste in men… Which he **_REALLY_** needs to work on, by the way—" this caused Torn to growl and Jak to roll his eyes "—but… If being with you makes him happy, then it's alright with me."

"And…?" Jak prodded, giving the ottsel a stern look. Daxter scuffed his foot against the table, looking very much like a sulky kid.

"And… I promise I won't make any comments about the two of you goin' out," the ottsel added grudgingly with a pout.

"Whatever," Torn muttered, crossing his arms. Daxter rolled his eyes.

"Are you sure you want this guy?" the ottsel asked his friend, shaking his furry head in disbelief.

"Daxter…" Jak warned.

"Alright, alright. I get it! Sheesh," Daxter muttered. Then he spotted the half eaten food on the table.

**_"PANCAKES!"_** the little ottsel shouted happily before pouncing.

Torn's eye began to twitch violently as he watched the rat eat HIS pancakes from HIS plate. Jak shook his head.

"I'll take care of the dishes," the blonde sighed, gathering the empty plates from the table before going to the kitchen.

Torn waited till he was sure the younger elf was out of sight. Then—

**_"ACK!"_** gasped Daxter as he was yanked up by the neck.

"I've had enough your stupid mouth," the redhead hissed, squeezing the ottsel's neck tightly as he stormed to the door.

"Pain…" replied the ottsel feebly. Torn mentally sighed. Sadly, he could not kill the rat. Jak would never forgive. However, that didn't mean he couldn't kick the rat's squirrelly ass out!

Yanking the door open, he threw the rat outside, and was quite satisfied when he saw the ottsel's tiny body collide against the side of the building opposite to them.

The redhead closed the door with a slam, feeling very triumphant. Whistling (yes, he was whistling. This is another sign that the world as we know it is coming to an end), the redhead strutted over to his desk.

Once he reached his desk, he opened the drawer and pulled out the maps that Jak had put away. He rolled the maps out again, then reached back into his drawer and pulled out some plans, which he looked over. After five minutes of reading, the redhead smiled slyly.

'Well well well,' an tiny, evil little voice in the back of his mind said. 'Looks like there's no missions today. Poor little Jak has nothing to do…'

Torn calmly placed the papers down on the desk and stood. With a twisted little grin on his face, the tattooed elf headed to the kitchen.

_"Oh, Jak…"_

* * *

**  
Hopefully, that steamy little scene makes up for the wait. Review please! I need reviews to keep me going! Yes, I'm a review whore!**


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